Random Travel, Part 3

Baltimore, MD 10:30pm, 10/21

I’ll start by reiterating that once you get into VA, the drive on I-95 is SO much better than before. The downside is that as you approach the Northeast, the metropolitan areas get bigger, and the traffic- and road systems- become exponentially more intense and thus, dangerous.

I’m no stranger to driving through downtown Richmond, I had to do it last month while I was working with Eagle. Lots, and I mean LOTS of city driving, and the way that the roadways loop above and below each other (and are so poorly labeled) is exasperating, but ultimately rewarding to have conquered. Driving the big truck through there wasn’t much fun, but I can say with some clarity that I conquered it like a regular badass. Even that, though, didn’t prepare me for the absolute concrete clusterfuck that is 95 and all of it’s children as you close on Washington, D.C.

Ideally, I’d put a picture here, but I can say with some clarity that if I had taken a picture while driving the fucking Jetsons inspired death paths, I would not be alive to blog about it. I couldn’t possibly find the words to completely explain it, but suffice it to say that every exit and every sign includes the number 95 in some way. I-95, I-295, I-395,I-495, I-895...see? After a while, they start to look the same to you too, don’t they? These overpasses were unreal. At any given moment I was driving HUNDREDS of feet above the ground on two-lane overpasses at 65mph- in a HUGE, loose, temperamental 10 ft. moving truck. If you know me, then you can understand the degree of anxiety inherent in this portion of the drive…

Aside from the roads, time seemed to stop here. I felt so accomplished for having made it through the day (including a phone call asserting that my mother would be coming home tomorrow…yeah, right), but I was so excited to finally get to Baltimore and see Jeefy that I felt like time was standing still.

But eventually, Baltimore rose from horizon and I got to see my Jeefy! Baltimore is an actual city, unlike any of the other places that I’ve lived, so naturally there was nowhere to park Dot. I parked her temporarily in a grocery store parking lot, but needed to go and get Jeefy to find me.

Perfection. I got ambushed coming out of the elevator on her floor!

We found some place to park the truck (kind of illegally) and then got to spend time drinking a few beers and just enjoying each other. We thought about going out, but at this point in my life, I’m content to just enjoy my friends’ company. It was nice to sit with someone who understands my humor and the sounds and faces I make, and what kind of beer I like (the nugget bought me Red Stripe!) and what my phrases mean. It was low key, but such a breath of fresh air. And, to make things better, Jeefy’s new roommate was really sweet and a lot of fun, as was her other new friend Paul (see below: we got a little drunk and went on an adventure to move his car.)

Strangely enough, it was even harder saying goodbye to depart for NYC than I thought it would be. I’m going back to Baltimore next weekend to play with Jeefy and her friends for Halloween- but still felt tears well up as I dropped her off at Peabody (that’s right, I dropped my little puddin’ off at school…I was so proud…). I think I might love her way too much.

After dropping off my Jeefs, I went to Wal-Mart for some things and then got on the road. I got a little bit lost on an exit trying to find gas, but I found the ultimate date spot for Jeefy and I, so it was worth it (just wait mah frin, you’re going to get so romanced next weekend).

And I’ll state again that I-95 is AWESOME once you’re in Maryland and beyond. AWESOME.

Service Houses FTW.

P.S. Did you know that there is a Brooklyn in Baltimore? I saw this sign and was fairly certain I'd actually manifested my teleporting abilities into something commercial. Then I realized that I was just delirious from copious amounts of caffeine and McDonald's.

I can never poop when I'm on road trips, so my stomach is in a perpetual state of owie.